Justice or Injustice: Is the price we pay it?
Just recently I went to visit my chiropractor and he asked me to bring several copies of my book for his clients. Of course I was thrilled, but I learned something very interesting from him. He said to me, “We are one in the same Kerie in our healing work, but we have different styles. We both know how our thoughts and emotions impact a person’s body. So many people that come to me need your book and they need help.” I looked at him and agreed. I shared how many people are stuck in the victim mentality and he said with such sadness in his eyes, “But Kerie, the justice is even more damaging”.
I will say I never really thought about it much and now it does make perfect sense. That is why I am sharing this insight with you today. The truth is that most people cannot fully heal and recover until you think and feel you got justice. So they stay attached to the pain, accident, court battles, divorce, hurtful words, disrespect, gene theory, or injustice. People will wait and wait for a verdict or some form of justice to surface before their true healing can take place. And what if your day of justice never arrives? What will happen then? Charles Dickens wrote a book called, “Bleak House”, in 1853. In his book, he showed how a person did become consumed and killed by the need for justice. It also showed how the man had many options to be patient, enjoy life, view the brighter side of life, and let go his rigid attachments to the courts outcome. He even had various people around him who cared and tried to advise him in the healthiest course of action, but still he was too caught up in seeking justice for his inheritance. And this man had something many people would consider priceless, which is unconditional love from a partner/wife. Yet his need for justice clouded his better judgment, ate away is happiness with the one he loved, and poisoned his heart. It showed how we can believe the money is ours and it is owed to us, but the battle is never won. You can battle it out in court and eventually spend all the money owed to you in legal fees. Then you are left with no financial wealth, peace of mind, or a healthy body. So was it really worth it all in the end or a life worth living? The answer is, “No”. Life is a gift as well as the people we love in our lives. How does this justice/injustice affect them? You can even dig deeper and see how it affects your work, motivation, productivity, outlook on life, or choices in life.
justice or injustice
So WHY is this so important to me…the idea of justice orinjustice? In my years of working with clients, I have seen how the ego does not want to change or be changed despite its suffering, fears, or inner turmoil. Our ego clings to being right at any cost or price. It can cling to the flawed belief that our genes control our biology. We can get lost and consumed by our egos self-rightness and our belief can become very rigid. At times we can expect too much from another person or expect someone to do something for us in return. All of these things make us a victim of our belief system. The only way to heal is to have a willingness to return to humanity. People need to relearn to become more flexible, adaptive and be able to move forward in life without seeking justice or playing the victim. Also, we cannot force anyone to see out point of view, show you kindness, be fair, scratch your back in return, or treat you with respect. We do live in a society that focuses upon winning, competition and survival of the fittest.
Just look at the various governments and countries fighting in war, fighting for wealth, and how large corporations are over-ruling the local business owners. I know it all seems unfair and wrong at times, but these are the issues we are all faced with day after day. What matters most is your inner world because that is the one you live in first. The outer world is only secondary. In order to heal we need to find the peace within us, practice forgiveness, connect to our heart again, and trust that the truth will be revealed in time. If you like, you can hand it over to a higher power if that gives you a sense of relief. And keep in mind if the truth is never revealed, so be it. Personally it can take years until you might hear how justice was revealed and if you think about over the centuries, justice was not granted until centuries later to the masses.
justice or injustice
The price one can pay for justice can be very expensive and eventually kill one’s spirit. We have all heard the saying, “Not until you are pushed against the wall by a crisis will a change take place”. So I have broken down the cost we pay for the justice we seek.
We can suffer physical pain and spend hundreds or thousands of dollars in medical expenses.
We can suffer from sleepless nights. Stewing over the injustice in our minds.
We can feed our emotional distress by overeating, drinking, gambling, or other addictive behaviors.
We can become irritable, unkind, angry, and strike out our frustration on an innocent person, family member or friend. You might even get a headache, an ulcer or suffer from other physical discomfort.
We can spend large amounts of money fighting in court or talking to a therapist.
And let’s not forget the medications, which are only a Band-Aid to the real issue at hand.
justice or injustice
When you take into consideration all the different ways we pay for our rigid beliefs around the subject of justice or injustice, you might want to ask yourself these questions for self discovery.
Is really worth the price you are paying?
Is the physical pain or heartache worth it?
Is the money it is costing you worth it?
Is it more important to be right or to be healthy?
Is the justice consuming your life or even robbing you of a life?
Is this justice killing your joy, happiness, sense of self, or spirit?
Is it better to fight against your illness, genes or physical condition or better to make peace with it?
If you sat down with a wise person or loving person, who only saw the best in you and wanted only the best for you, what would they say? And would be open and willing to listen?
justice or injustice
Let me give you a personal example of how I deal with justice or injustice. If you have read my book or some of my past newsletters, I have spoken about my mother’s dementia. Just recently, I took my mother out to lunch to celebrate her birthday. We had a lovely time and all was well. About a week later my brother called me. He was concerned about a spat my mother and I got into. I was unaware that we even got into a spat and he told me about another one of her false memories, which evolved around me again. He shared with me that my mom feels that I have a high level of animosity towards her. He wanted me to confront her about it and for some reason; I did not feel the need to seek justice or injustice.
I shared with him that what she thinks about me is a mirror reflection of what she is struggling with inside herself because I have not displayed any animosity towards her. My statement made him think and he shared with me that our mother is very proud of me, but she is jealous of my success as well as many of my personal accomplishments in life. So for some interesting reason without me evening saying anything, he pointed out the justice/injustice she struggling with inside by saying, “As you know she tried several times to start her own business, and never made it work. This goes back to a sense of justice/revenge – things did not work out for me, then they shouldn’t work out for you, it’s not fair – could easily build feelings of unwarranted resentment.”
What is so sad to me is it is much harder at her age to fix this distorted perception or out dated belief system for in my heart there is only love for her. So I shared with my brother that all I can do is forgive her and love her each and every time she manifests a false negative memory about our relationship. And to confirm my decision and choices, her doctor agreed with me in allowing her to keep her false memories. There is no point in arguing with her or trying to make her see my point of view. I can live with her false memories and let it go. That is why I originally had no desire to confront her…in the end it really does not matter. What matters is that I can still love her, accept her and find forgiveness.